(in the middle of a conversation)

by Alexander Mironov

. . . Hello, hello, I only hear you badly!
— Goodness!  I can’t see anything,
though I’m glad to see and hear you.

Change phones.
I’m looking for . . . Where are my glasses ?  Are you waiting ?
(The guests have arrived and I have as many concerns
as an apple tree has apples) — Yes, I’m waiting.
— Oh, I’m sorry for all the noise and bustle . . .
— Hello, hello, I can hear you badly . . .
Fix your phone . . . (I can’t see
a way to fix it.
And what for ?  I need another heart to install.)

Translated from Russian by Aleksey Porvin and Tony Brinkley